Wednesday, April 1, 2015

The way I see it...

I have so many flaws.  There probably isn’t enough space
to list them all.  One of those flaws is something I know I
do, but I just can’t get past.  It makes me crazy.

I have a problem letting things go.  Have you seen the
movie, “Frozen?”  That part where Elsa sings at the top
of her lungs, “Let it go, let it go...”  Yep, I need to
do that.

I don’t know if it’s because I’m a female or because
I’m Jamie, but it is just hard for me.  Subconsciously, I
tell myself that whatever it is is not a big deal and it was
out of my control and therefore shouldn’t get under 
my skin.

And then there’s the other side of my brain that says,
“But, but, but... wait a second that person/place/thing
did something that really upset you and you shouldn’t
forget that!”  So, my internal struggle continues.  What
my mind tells me to do versus what my heart feels.

You know that my motto for so many things is, “Is this a
big deal in the scheme of life?”  Ninety-nine percent of
the time the answer to that question is no.  Sometimes that
calms me and after a few deep breaths I’m good to go.
Sometimes that doesn’t work.

Another Jamie-ism?  I’m too emotional.  I’m not
calling it a flaw, but I am overly-emotional about pretty
much everything.  Whether it be losing my patience too
quickly or crying too easily.

I’m not going to apologize for being overly-emotional and
having a big heart though.  I care about people.  I
genuinely do.  My family.  My friends.  Kids I meet in
the hospital.  People I observe at the store, the library,
the playground.  I am a people watcher by nature and I
always wonder what people’s stories are.  When we were
stuck at the airport in Orland for a three hour layover?
That was kind of awesome because I just people-watched.

I see a commercial and I cry.  I read a book and I cry.
My kids say something that pulls on the heart strings and I
blink back tears. Is it so wrong to care about people?  Is
it wrong to be emotional?  Is it wrong to (flaws and all)
try to be the best person you can be to others?  To be kind
to others?  Even when it’s hard?  Especially when it’s

I grew-up with parents that were teachers and then a dad
that was a high school principal and it was HARD. I’ve
told you that before.  Kids were mean.  But it was always
ingrained in my head to do the “politically correct”
thing and put a smile on your face and be polite.  Even
when all of your emotions are telling you otherwise.

To this day, that lesson stays with me.  There are times
(especially lately) when I just want to say what’s really
on my mind and not grin and bear it.  But, I don’t.
Because I care about people even if they don’t in

Ok, I just re-read that and it sounds like I am all-types of
an emotional rollercoaster lately and that would be the
truth.  I’m not always rainbows and unicorns.  Somedays
are just hard.  Some weeks are hard.  This too shall

Anyway, if you are still reading this (thank you!).  Let's 
remember that everything happens for a reason and some
things are just blessings in disguise, but that's just the way
I see it. 

P.S.  I'm starting to work on a my Disney posts, so happy pics and all that awesomeness coming soon!

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