Acceptance.

We just celebrated our one year anniversary of Blake coming home from the hospital a couple of weekends ago.  It has made me think a lot.  About so many different things.

One of the things that I think has helped our family tremendously is the fact that we have accepted Blake's medical issues and problems from the beginning.  Aaron and I had a talk after finding out the severity of things at our 22 week ultrasound.  We decided that we had two choices and we chose to be positive.  

If we didn't stay optimistic, our life would be hell.  No question about it.  We would dwell on the why me? Why us?  Why are family? And all of that other stuff that goes with it.

Guess what?  Those aren't the kind of people that we are.  Does Blake's kidney disease suck?  Yes.  Do I wish I could go through this for him?  Yes.  Do I wish I could protect him from the pokes and prods and hurt?  Yes.

These ups and downs though, they are part of our life.  I'm not going to lie and say I'm always super happy.  Blake had a hole in his catheter right before Dam to Dam.  I headed down to Iowa City at 9 PM and cried a good chunk of the way.  I hate our family being split up like that.  

I remember one time Jenna asked me why God would give us a baby that had bad kidneys.  I told her that I just didn't know.  She responded with, "Because he chose us mom.  He chose our family to have Blake."  I think about that so often.

I'm a quote person.  When things get rough I remember them.  The first one is, "God never promised it would be easy, he just promised it would be worth it."  So true.

The second is, "You were given this life because you were strong enough to live it."  We can do this. And we know that.

When I see this...

...it makes all the ups and downs worth it.  His cute smile.  His giggles.  His snuggles. I love my little man so much!  

As for Jenna and Brody.  I don't think we could ask for a better big brother and sister.  We are always truthful with them and tell them what's going on and why.  They probably know more about dialysis than any other four and six year old out there. :)  I know that in some way, all of Blake's siblings are going to be better people because of his situation.  

We are currently creeping ever closer to transplant weight.  No testing has been done yet, but we will keep you all up to date on that.  In the meantime, we just need to keep this boy healthy and growing.